14. Sep, 2013

Sibling saviours

My parents separated when I was twelve.

Up until then our family unit appeared to be the happiest in the world! They weren’t the type to argue in front of the children so life was fairly harmonious!

I am the youngest of three. My big brother is seven years my senior and my sister four and a half years older than me.

I have fond memories of the importance my two siblings played in my life. My brother was my loving protector from all who dared to bully me, and my sister my heroine and best friend.

My life seemed as normal as most of my friends, until the day I was told by my mum that my dad had left home.

All I could think of was, what had I done that was so bad that could cause him to leave? When you are a child you see life through a child's eyes and you tend to think the whole world revolves around you, so of course….this must have been all about me!

One of the indisputable things about life is that things can change very rapidly. Later that year the bottom fell out of my world again when my brother moved out of the family home, and then my sister followed soon after.

I felt betrayed, abandoned, unloved, angry and bitter. I also felt defective and I blamed myself for my family’s implosion.

I had no choice but to pick myself up and adjust to my changed life and living arrangements!

Life’s tough and shit happens!!

My siblings physically left me (or rather left home), but we have only ever grown closer in the emotional and spiritual sense.

Hardship, happiness, loss and illness have connected us in such a powerful way that when I am in my siblings presence I feel my heart fill with love and pride, and I experience a warm glow as if we are joined by heart strings.

We breathe life and light into each other when our souls feel as hollow as a rainforest log.

My brother and sister have cast their eternal glow across my spirit, and have helped to guide me through my darkness and reassure me that they will always be there to share my journey with me!

* I can't write this without acknowledging my little brother too - I love you too mate!!