16. Aug, 2013

Smooth facades

I have been keeping a journal of my bumpy journey over the past few years. I am not a journalist but I did do research, write backgrounds and intros and some web blogging as part of my job as a radio producer.

I far from consider myself to be a writer of any sort, but if there is one thing I have learned during those years is that the best stories undoubtedly come from the heart. We are the story!

This blog began as an exercise to get my creative juices flowing and to help purge myself of all the hate and bitterness I have carried around for many years. Self-esteem is not my strong point!

I recently wrote a short story called “Love, my bridge over troubled waters” for an ABC Open Project. The response was overwhelming. What I did notice is that no matter how hard we collectively try to break down the stigma of mental illness, there continues to be a notion of “shame” in having it.

All of the comments were beautiful, praising my honesty and my courage in speaking out. I think many who have experienced this living hell and come out of it, don’t actually care whether people think we are mental or not. Life changes; things have new and different meanings. For me, honesty is an umbilical cord to others that may be struggling. If I can help someone in need by sharing my experience then my suffering hasn’t been in vain.

I still live with shame, we all do and we all cope with it in different ways . I have become so much more tolerant of the way people act and behave because I have developed a greater understanding of how our minds work.

These days, when I look into someone’s eyes, I look for and often see  a whole other world going on behind the smooth facades that we put on like make-up each day.